Frank zappa Lead guitar Vocals Warren cucurullo Rhythm guitar Vocals Denny walley Slide guitar Vocals Ike willis Lead vocals Peter wolf Keyboards Arthur barrow Bass Vocals Ed mann Percussion Vinnie colaiuta Drums Arriving at l Ron hoover's modernistic office cathedral warehouse condominium complex Joe is greeted by a pre recorded message and a dramatically illuminated image on a wall sized tv scr L Ron hoover: Welcome to the first church of appliantology The white zone is for loading and unloading only Don't you be tarot fied It's just a token Of my extreme Don't you be tarot fied It's just a token Of my extreme Don't you never try to Look behind my eyes You don't wanna know What they have seen Don't you never try to Look behind my eyes You don't wanna know What they have seen Joe: Thinking to himself Some people think That if they go too far They'll never get back To where the rest of Them are I might be crazy But there's one thing I know You might be surprised At what you find When ya go And thus Having ration alized his expedition to l Ron's modernistic office cathedral warehouse condominium complex Joe seeks the answer to his problem Joe: Oh oh oh Mystical advisor What is my problem Tell me Can you see L Ron hoover: Well You have nothing To fear My son You are a latent Appliance fetishist It appears to me Joe: That all seems very Very strange I never craved A toaster Or a color t V L Ron hoover: A latent appliance Fetishist Is a person who Refuses to admit To his or herself That sexual Gratification can Only be achieved Through the use of Machines Get the picture Joe: Are you telling me I should come out Of the closet now Mr Ron L Ron hoover: No My son You must go into The closet Joe: What L Ron hoover: And you will have Joe: Heh L Ron hoover: Hey A lot of fun That's where They all live So if you want an Appliance to love you You'll have to Go in there 'N' get you one Joe: Well That seems Simple enough L Ron hoover: Yes But if you want a Really good one You'll have to learn a Foreign language Joe: German For instance L Ron hoover: That's right A lot of really cute Ones come from Over there Fifty bucks Please And a cheerful group of Appliantologists dance Into the room wearing Aluminum foil lab smocks Lock arms in a circle Around joe Making sure He pays in full All the While singing with l Ron As he delivers his final Instructions L Ron hoover: If you been Mod o fied It's an illusion An yer in between Don't you be Tarot fied It's just a lot of nothin' So what can it mean If you been Mod o fied It's an illusion An yer in between Don't you be Tarot fied It's just a lot of nothin' So what can it mean If you been Mod o fied It's an illusion An yer in between